When I was about thirteen, I discovered Pinterest. Wow, what a day that was! I quickly found the extensive “wedding” side of Pinterest, and I fell down the rabbit hole fast. That original board is still alive and well today. However, I realized recently that somewhere along the way, I started thinking a lot about my future wedding, and not so much about my future marriage. I was too focused on the white dress and the bouquets, and less focused on the fact that marriage means building a life together, just like Carl and Ellie did.
As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I have the opportunity to be sealed with my future spouse for eternity! That means forever, and ever, amen. Someday, I will walk into a holy temple as a single individual, and emerge as a couple, united together and with God. This kind of marriage is important for two major reasons, according to Elder David A. Bednar.
- “The natures of male and female spirits complete and perfect each other, and therefore men and women are intended to progress together toward exaltation.
- By divine design, both a man and a woman are needed to bring children into mortality and to provide the best setting for the rearing and nurturing of children.”
These two statements remind me of my great-grandpa and great-grandma. They met while my great-grandpa was on his mission in Switzerland, and began writing to each other. My great-grandma moved to the States, and happened to be living in my great-grandpa’s hometown.
The day my grandpa Jack returned home from his mission, his step-mom died in a car accident. His sisters told him that he needed to get married so that his dad could move in with him. Therefore, he and my grandma were married only five days after he came home!
Despite the abruptness of their marriage, I have never seen a more loving or happy couple. They truly completed and perfected each other. She had high anxiety; he was incredibly calm. He struggled to show affection to his children; she taught him how. As such, they created a happy, comfortable home where the gospel was paramount. All of their children, and most of their grandchildren, are active members of the Church and were married in the temple.
According to Elder Bruce C. Hafen, the kind of marriage I speak of is called a covenant marriage. In his talk, he mentioned several aspects of a covenant marriage that I would like to touch on.
- Couples in a covenant marriage work through troubles rather than giving up or giving in.
- They are bound to each other, to the community, and to God.
- They each give 100%.
- They promise to keep their covenants even though they do not know what risks may come.
- “They must surrender unconditionally, obeying God and sacrificing for each other” (Hafen, p. 2).
- If they keep their covenants, they will have incomprehensible joy.
As I look over that list, a covenant marriage doesn’t sound particularly easy. In fact, it sounds like it will be pretty hard sometimes. However, the idea of incomprehensible joy with a spouse is exciting. I am reminded, in fact, of a beautiful video posted by my Church a few years ago.
That is what a covenant marriage looks like in action. I know it is attainable for each of us if we are willing to love selflessly and put the Lord first in our marriages. As for me, I plan on spending less time on Pinterest and more time bettering myself to prepare for my future marriage. To do this, I want to work on becoming more humble and more empathetic, more willing to sacrifice and more patient.
Eternity Means Forever 