When I was in third grade, my teacher decided to create a classroom simulation of the U.S. government. I was elected by the “president” to be a member of the Supreme Court. For half an hour each day, different members of our grade would bring us “cases”. These ranged from fights on the playground to punishments given by teachers. My fellow justices and I would talk together to reach a unanimous decision, which we then communicated to the rest of the grade.
That simple experience, while teaching me about government, also taught me quite a bit about the importance of unity. Regardless of our personal opinions and experiences, we had to reach a common verdict. Each of us had an equal voice and shared our opinions freely. However, no experience is a better teacher of unity and equality than the marriage relationship. According to M. Russell Ballard, “In this divinely sanctioned partnership, husbands and wives work together, each bring his or her unique contribution to the family” (1997, p. 56).
A wonderful example of this kind of unity is found in my own family tree. My grandparents are as different from one another as two people can be. He loves to exercises; she loves to sew. He loves adventures; she likes to stay home or take care of grandkids. However, despite these major differences, they are equal partners. They support each other in every decision. When my grandpa wants to go on a week long bike tour, my grandma joins him. When she wants to go visit the grandkids, he gladly fends for himself at home. As they engage in these little sacrifices, they grow closer together and more united.
We live in a divisive world where people cling desperately to their own opinions and ideals. Many individuals choose not to marry as a result of their individualistic ideas. “Why”, they might ask, “should I marry when it requires reconciling differences and sacrificing the things I want (like a career or my plans to travel the world)?” These situations beg the question: How can two totally different people become knit together as one and cleave together as “one flesh”? (Gen 2:24). The answer is simple. True unity requires the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
According to Henry B. Eyring in his talk “That We May Be One”, there are several essential elements to accessing the Savior’s Atonement and therefore becoming more unified.
First, we must allow our natures to be changed. This means forsaking our own selfish desires, and putting the gospel at the center of our lives. For our grandparents, that means faithfully serving together in the temple, praying together, and ministering to others. Their connection with others and with God also connects them.
Second, we should allow the Spirit into our hearts and our lives. One of the things I admire the most about my grandparents is their ability to spend time in quiet contemplation and thought. Without the worldly distractions of constant media, they are better able to feel the constant guidance of the Holy Ghost.
Thirdly, we need to forgive others. My grandparents bicker quite a bit (and it is hilarious). However, they forgive each other almost immediately. They don’t hold grudges. They have a sense of humor about their little arguments. This brings an atmosphere of unity and love into their marriage.
I am sure each of you can think of examples of married couples who are united together. In most cases, a love of God is a central element of that unity. I know that as we seek for unity with our spouse, we must also seek for unity with God.
Eternity Means Forever 